[Christine]
Say there's this person you pass in the hall every day
You've known him since seventh grade
You're used to thinking about him in a certain way
From the persona that he displayed

Then something changes, and he changes

From a guy that you'd never be into

[The squip]
Take your hands out of your pockets
Arch your back, puff out your chest
Add some swagger to your gate or
You'll look like a mas-tur-ba-tor
Fix your posture, then the rest

[Jeremy]
But I am a masturbator--

[The squip]
We'll fix that
All your

[The squip]
If this is going to work, you can’t just listen
You have to obey
Now repeat after me
Woah, everything about you is so terrible

[Jeremy]
Everything about me is just terrible

[The squip]
Good
Woah, everything about you makes me wanna die

[J

[Chloe]
Jake's parent's room. Don't worry, they're not using it

[Jeremy]
Wow, you really know you're way around

[Chloe]
Yeah, I've had sex in pretty much every room in this house

[Jeremy]
Wha-?

[Chloe]
Because I dated jake! God, what kind of slut do yo

[The Squip]
Brooke is going to offer you a ride
It is imperative you accept

[Brooke]
So, do you wanna ride?

[The Squip]
Yes

[Jeremy]
Yes
But I'm supposed to meet my friend Michael!

[Brooke]
Oh

[The Squip]
Jeremy, if this is going to w

[Brooke]
Picked out a costume for tonight
Made sure to get a size that was a lot too tight
You can kind of see my business
But I'll act like I don't know

Woah

[Jake]
I got a condom

[Chloe]
And a flask

[Rich]
I stole my older brother's jason mas

I love play rehearsal
Because it's the best!
Because it is fun
I love play rehearsal
And I get depressed as soon as it's done

But not depressed as in like kill yourself depressed
No, I'm not into self-harm
Dude, I swear, here check my arm!

See, I just use the

I already know what it's like to be the loser
I should find out what it's like to not be the loser
Or the geek
Or the
Whatever

Think I felt inconsequential
Since middle school began
I knew I had no potential
To be the leading man
But based on how today's goi

I am hanging in the bathroom at the biggest party of the fall
I could stay right here or disappear
And nobody'd even notice at all

I'm a creeper in a bathroom
'Cause my buddy kinda left me alone
But I'd rather fake pee than stand awkwardly
Or pretend to check a text on

[Jeremy]
C-c-c c'mon c-c-c- c'mon, go go
C-c-c c'mon c-c-c- c'mon, go go
I'm waiting for my porno to load
My brain is gonna freakin' explode
And now of course it's time to hit the road
Which means I'll be uncomfortable all day
But that really isn't such a change
I

[Jeremy]
C-c-c-cmon, c-c-c-cmon, go
Ow!

[The SQUIP]
What did we say about masturbation?

[Jeremy]
I was just gonna check my email!

[The SQUIP]
You can't lie to me, Jeremy, I'm inside your brain
Now, we're going to devise a system
I tally every time yo

[Mr heere]
Jeremy
Is in big bad trouble right now
It's trouble that he can't see
And I gotta help him somehow
I don't know what he wants
But I know what he needs
He'll need a dad so strong
To help him not slip away
I haven't been a dad for so long
But I th

[Squip]
You were always quite the loser, jeremy
Then I invaded
And you upgraded
Ba-da-ba-ba
Woah
Jeremy, it's true that I found you
But look around you
Woah

All your peers are just so incomplete
You can't see it, but they're all in pain
Their operati

[Mr. Reyes]
Places for scene two!
People, remember: Once puck gives you the pansy serum
You have to really sell that you're transforming into a zombie
Excellent work, ms. Valentine

[Jeremy]
Excellent? But chloe's terrible, she never remembers her-
Mr. Reyes? You can

[Jenna]
OMG, Chloe, answer me
Woah, wait until I tell you what I heard!
It's too fucked to type, this shit is ripe
Call back, I'll yell you every word

[Chloe]
Jenna Rolan calling
Ugh, jenna Rolan calling
Jenna Rolan calling

Hey!

[Jenna]
Ohmygod-o

[Rich]
Freshman year
I didn't have a girlfriend or a clue
I was a loser just like you
Good times would only
Soar by
I was gross
As every female would attest
My sexting was a futile quest
My little penis was depressed
He was so lonely
Poor guy
I was

Apocalypse of the damned!

Level 9!

The cafitorium!

Find the bad guy, push 'em aside
Then move on forward with your friend at your side
It's a two-player game, so when they make an attack
You know you got a brother gonna have your back
Then you stay on track, and

[Brooke]
This is my favorite place behind the school

[Brooke]
Being here
With you right now
Our future is so clear
Our union is so near

[Brooke & the squip]
Being here
With you right now
I'll tenderly guide you

[The squip & (jeremy)]

[Mr Heere]
You gotta buy her a rose
Compliment her on her clothes

[Michael]
Say you appreciate that she's smart

[Rich]
Nah, man, you tell her that she
Excites you sexually

[Mr Heere, Michael & Rich]
And that's the way you get
To her heart
Tru