Dig

Soft skin and dead hair
And these tired eyes
And I want to fuck to myself
And I want to eat my self
Broad back and bad tits, yes I know my kind
Raw mouth, worn out, I've never felt so alive
You've realized that I'll let you hurt me
And now you want to do it all of the time
No bruise is permanent, neither am I
But you're welcome to try and try

In the most ecstatic of senses
I have embraced my suffering
Twenty six years of false pretenses
Again, pretending to care about men
I am loved insofar as I cherish this pain
You should shut your mouth
Because language means nothing

When every set of fingers leaves a different dig on my hips
Too big, on my back, it's too big
When I get you alone I'll point out all of my problems
Then I'll lay still while you try and resolve them
And you can read the story of my last six weeks
In little black bruises and marks from boy's teeth
And that shit hurts- but if I'm anything less than perfection
Well shit
Nobody told me