Survivor's Guilt

This vision that’s haunting me
That's causing this lack of sleep (a man)
Embodied, entrapped by disbelief (a man)
Who had it all but chose not to see
Rain hits the window, as I sit in the quiet
With only the drops on the pane to break the silence
An image of defeat, a man of anguish
Efforts exhausted on dreams, now vanished
(Exhausted on dreams, now vanished)

A home erased, torn from
The moral drive to carry on
Every morning I look in this mirror
Thinking how luxurious my life could be
My visions blurring
This lack of sleep, has got me in a haze
Accepting invitations, now I lay unconscious for days
Still empty, in this bed that bears so much weight
This weight of guilt, it holds me in place

A home erased, torn from
The moral drive to carry on
Desperately reaching for a hand to pull me out
Of this bottomless lake that I made here for myself
As I drift from the surface, I now realize I must accept these decisions
Let the cold embrace me, it's now the darkness in which I live in
I'm trying to push this to the back of my mind
Just like I had done to you so many times