Mel's Song

Come stay with me, stay in my room,
My duvet smells but so would you
If you hadn?t washed in as long as i have
And i?ll wash my balls if you say that you?ll grab them.
But nah, i?m not gonna make you do that,
It?s just you and me on the bench where we?re sat,
So come back to my room and we can watch a movie
And my passion for you will go right straight through me.

I?ll say something like ?baby, could you be the one
That will always throw your love to me??
And you?ll be like ?nah, you?re just some pissed prick
Try?na get some of me and that makes me sick!?
And i?ll be like ?nah, i love you so much?
And i know it?s pathetic but i?ve had enough

Of being alone on my own in my home
I just wanna be here when
You're screaming and moan to me.
Baby i want you, but i know you don?t,
You?ll just point at my boner
And say "fuck off home!"

Melanie, won?t you spend the day with me?
I don?t know how to spell your second name but i?ll try.
Melanie, won?t you spend the day with me?
Won?t you slap me one more time?

And i?ll cry and i?ll cry, and i might wonder why
This beautiful Mel girl don?t like this guy?
Is it cause i didn?t wash my hair today
And a dry bit of hair gel fell your way?
Is it cause my bo had nowhere to go
Except straight up your nose
But you smell like a rose!
Not that i sniffed you of course
I mean i really would like to
You?re not just some bitch on a bench
The boys like to lie to.

The fact is, Mel, i was drunk when i saw you.
Did i not make it clear that i massively adore you?
You know i?d even quit drinking for you.
I should?ve been sober, but i didn?t want to.
Before we started we were already over
?Cause i can?t talk to girls when i?m sober.
Girls like you aren?t common,
And when they come around, i miss them.
But i can still say that i sat on a bench with the prettiest girl in Brixham

Melanie, won?t you spend the day with me?
I don?t know how to spell your second name but i?ll try.
Melanie, won?t you spend the day with me?
Won?t you slap me one more time?

I?m sorry if you think that £1.50 was wasted,
Those were the best damn chips i ever tasted.
Won?t you slap me one more time?

Melanie, won?t you spend the day with me?
I don?t know how to spell your second name but i?ll try.
Melanie, won?t you spend the day with me?
Won?t you slap me one more time?

Melanie, won?t you spend the day with me?
I don?t know how to spell your second name but i?ll try.
Melanie, won?t you spend the day with me?
Won?t you slap me one more time?

One more time.