Rape, murder, suicide
These thoughts are constantly with me
Of course, this is not mentally healthy
There is no doubt that by present standards
I am mentally ill, a hopeless sociopath

My reason tells me
That I have nothing to live for

Intellectually, sexually

Naomi, a child of God's good grace
A testament to patient faith
This fragile orphan life exposed
To patricide and violent overthrow

Such is the modern world's incline
That beauty and adversity are fated meet

We are committed and we are bound
By both virtue and oat

When you first kill someone, it's like breaking the ice
It's an obstacle in the beginning, but after that
It's nothing

People are like maggots
Small, blind and worthless

Mary Ellen Jones, of immaculate skin and fragile bones
Unbroken, tight and clean (and shy of sixte

I have miscalculated
I know I can save the situation
By a lot of disagreeable work
But I see no good reason for going on
What would come next..?
The whole business is not worth it

Life is not worth the trouble, after all'

Lines of streetlights blind
And illuminate the rain
Blood washes with the water
As it trickles from my veins
This broken bottle begs another
Cigarettes and broken glass
I want this night to cross the line
For this to be my last.

The fear of destitution
Is de

In my memories
I can see the sky as it was when I was a child
Gazing up above the fences of our yard
It was endless, so beautiful and blue

My world, the world I knew was so small
Our humble home the universe
There were no crowds, no town
No thoughts of backing out</

Recollection of past affections
Fading gradually into obscurity and confusion
Leaving only awareness of a dismal present
And a hopeless future
It's dark all the time now
And the emptiness within me has become unbearable
I can't stand this pain any longer
Nor the crush

So it comes to this
Such promise through eyes of youth
A child's blinkered view
The world that could have been
I've struggled with the truth
Denied the filth I've seen
A hope for a better tomorrow
For fruit amongst the thorn
This life has long since rotted
All

And so this opus scorned attracts cognition
The cast of faceless patrons
Whose stories as yet remain untold
Manifest
Curtains decrepit, set, stage and scene attended
Demure as starlight stalks
Through cracks in an ageless vanity
Enter disposition!

Bid welcome all, my treasured guests
To that which I present
Six chapters through, two volumes deep
Upon which to obsess
Six tales of darkness, rage and fear
Six horrors of the mind
An unforgiving madness awaits
Ambivalence, the trusting and the blind

Allow me t

Where is the light in an abyss?
Where is the comfort in death?
Give me salvation, give me anything
Give me a reason to draw breath.

The truth of this world is failure
The worth of persistence, despair
Everything's cold and so distant
Please take me away from here.</

Stark naked, cold, and in inglorious entire
As an open wound upon the concept flesh of humanity
I now submit my will to body
Forgivenesses as far beyond my grasp
As were near the ironic values of those delusions
Which once claimed day's hours, and fought the warmth from starl

Mediocrity's face, no greater the torment
Spared potent duresses and obvious malady
From childhood's lament, through youth's awkward epiphanies
Time ushered apartheid, wisdom bought clarity

For years, nigh on decades, that threshold advanced
Persecuted by virtues reserved f

When each waking moment
Begins to feel as though it has already been
An emotionless repeat
Of a failure endured
When icicles spread throughout
And skin begins to mark
The illusion of buoyancy shatters
Nothing is perfect, beauty a myth
Driven like nails through bon

As ashes gently lain to rest
Upon a quiet soil
Unmoved by winds of turbulence
Unbroken by the fall
Such captivating beauty lies
In that which holds its truth
The unadulterated preservation of its youth

Where angels fell from skies above
From heights of gilded gr

Blackouts and depression
Each hangover is longer than the last
I pray to death's release
That the next time will be for good
A night without morning
A dusk without a dawn
Slowly it all falls away
Despite perseverance
Disappointment after bitter failure
Eventua

Through years of lucid trauma
Through tears and sleepless nights have I screamed
Bid terrors, leave this savant!
Get out mine ears, away my sight!

With every waking hour
She calls to me with wanton grace
How can I stay this horror
And the truth of my affliction mirr