Oh, we are six little eves, waiting for an adam
Someone who will make our poor hearts pound
Until that happy day, we're sad to have to say
This old boy's the only guy in town

A demon in truth, but an angel in fiction
A woman's the greatest of all contradiction
She'll li

Anna marie, the girl I adore
Anna marie, the one I live for
I'd travel the world, o'er land and sea
I'd never find one like you, anna marie

We went to the open air theatre
One summer's night in the park
Soon I had to excuse myself
And I wandered off in the dark

Annie from brighton once ordered a steak weighing nine and a quarter pounds
The butcher, he said: Will you take it, ma’am, or shall I send it ‘round?
She said: No, I just want to look at it, ‘cause I’ve been dieting like a chump
And that’s what I’ve lost, and I just want to see what

Now, there was just my daughter and me when the hoodlums came in
They took the jukebox and money out of the till
And when they went out through the door
My daughter said: Pa, I hung onto a fifty-dollar bill
I said: Now, how in the heck did you do that?
Well, I was sitting on

(Oh, Bianca, lovely Bianca)

Now, Bianca McBrown weighs three hundred pounds
She got eyes like rissoles in the snow
She comes from St. Kitts, got a big pair of mitts
She could lay Mike Tyson out with one blow
When she lays in the sand, the tide goes out and
Refuses to co

And there's a heartache and a memory and just a tear or two
In a broken-hearted lover's stew

There are nine carrots to remind me of the ring I bought for you
Some mint for all the lovely things we meant to d
A lettuce 'cause your mom and dad would not let us alone
I won't p

Now, when I was young, and my figure was sleek
(Memories)
I had a different gal every night of the week
And each gal knew for certain which was her day
You see, their names were Sandy, Mandy
Trudy, Wendy, Ferdy, Heidi, and Sally-May

And when people ask me why I never ma

Colleen, Colleen
Oh, I'm aching for you
Colleen, Colleen
My heart's breaking for you

Now, Jock sat in the emergency
Ward as nervous as he could be
Nurse Colleen said
Now, what's that there just above your knee?
He said: Oh, that's my sporran, ma'am
She said<

You could hear the hoofbeats pound
As they raced across the ground
And the rattle of the wheels
As they went 'round and 'round
And he galloped into market street
His badge upon his chest
His name was ernie
And he drove the fastest milk cart in the west

Now, erni

The wisest man I ever knew had a cottage outside Loew
His name was David Alexander Kidd
It was David who predicted the world would end in 1960
And for David Alexander Kidd, it did

He was around his grocer, Mr. Spicer, playing with his bacon slicer
A lovely girl with great b

Now, one day, I saw in gerona, by a river so quiet and remote
Eight lovely girls from the college, they were all in the same boat
And as they rode in unison by me, I gallantly raised my hat
And I said with a sigh: I wish that I could stroke a crew just like that

Oh, but I'm fly

Well, hey there, suits, how do you dig my groove?
We've got jokes to burn your bums and freeze your cool
We're gonna get on up and party down
You're not going to see us frown
We're gonna dig a beat like a sassafras mama with a real petite
You can dive past the masses with the

Now, lucy went down on a farm, tried to milk a cow
Though she tried, she couldn't get the hang of it somehow
The farmer looked at lucy, and he murmured with a frown
Well, you just hang on tightly, gal, and she'll jump up and down

Oh, gather in the mushrooms, put 'em in a pot

The couple looked down at their newborn child
In their shack that was falling to bits
The mother said: Let's call it Johnny
The father said: Let's call it quits
And when Johnny was four, and his pa was too poor
To buy toys from the Christmas shop shelf
So he just fired hi

Now, Jack was working on the farm one evening in July
When all at once, a gypsy girl came gaily tripping by
She smiled as she went running barefoot through his cabbage patch
Her hair was long and black, and she had fingernails to match
Oh, let us play of hide-and-seek, the gypsy

I rise at six, and then I feed the chicks
And I'm feeling lonesome and blue
And when I milk the cow, it seems, somehow
My thoughts keep straying to you
And as the horse and I plow the field nearby
Your memory I can't erase
For as I look in the rear of the horse, my dear

I'll never know why a horse
Grazing in a field all day
Should be so hard to sit upon
When he's so full of hay

I'll never know how a rose
Can look so sweet and pure
And hold its head up high
When it's standing in manure

I'll never know
(Never know, I'll nev

Give her your hand when she's lost her way
Give her your shoulder to cry on
Whether the day is bright or gray
Give her your heart to rely on

Blow her a kiss from across the room
Say she looks nice when she's not
Touch her hand as you pass her chair
Little things mea

(He's a lonely boy, such a lonely boy)

Listen to the story
Of a lonely fool
Who fell in love with teacher
When I was at school
But I knew our love could never be
She could not be mine
For she was nearly twenty-three
I was thirty-nine

Lonely boy, lonely boy

She thinks she is slim like a willow
She's just skinny and bony and tall
If she hadn't been blessed with two warts on her chest
She'd have no figure at all
She likes to please all the men, but she's so terribly thin
There is hardly enough to go round
Once, she swallowed a