I Was Happy When You Died

In every moment of ambivalence
I'd find some comfort in the knowledge
That somewhere you may be watching from afar
And in time we'll see each other again
But for now I'm tightly clinging to an unseen hand
That leads me through the dark
Praying that it's you

Softly singing through the annals of my youth
Never one to be dramatic
But I knew you'd be unable to depart
Without making sure we understood you'd always be around
Out of sight
And sometimes I still find that hard to sing about

We've gotta ask if you could feel it as you left?
Cause there was laughter from another room
A warmth imbued in everyone you knew

And it feels uncomfortable to say it out loud
But I was happy when you died
When I found out
Everyone was full of love and of light
Sharing stories of your life
And we still speak of you in dulcet tones
Every word in homage to the houses you've made homes

I wanna know if you could hear it as you left?
Cause I was laughing from another room
Your brevity suffused in me
Even though I'm still bereft of how to praise you adequately
I hope to God that I still make you
Hope to God that I still make you proud

Still all I wanna know is why you disappeared
Still all I wanna know is why you disappeared