If I Owned A Midget

life's got me mad, but if i had a midget i'd be glad
to watch him jump around on my nintendo power pad
he'd have a big head, short legs and long torso
the name that i'd give my pet midget is little gordo
i'd teach him tricks like back flips and side kicks
when company came over he'd preform and get tips

while im eatin' at night
in the kitchen he'd be able
to get the food scraps that i threw under the table
if my midget was ever bad
and acted enraged
then i'd take him to the bathroom
and put him in his cage
but if he kept actin' up and really made me sick
i'd hang him upside down
and poke him with a stick
Little Gordo
would be good, mosta the time though
he'd like to wear a helmet and run around yelling